Things I’ve come to realise recently:
- You have to work hard at staying positive. It’s a daily battle. Especially for someone like me who tends to fall into that black hole all too easily. Not only do I consciously have to work at being positive – not letting my “bad thoughts” and anxiety get to me – when I have succeeded in doing so, I also have to seriously remind myself to keep it up.
I’ve got to ensure each night that I am motivated for the next day instead of dreading all there’s left to do. And each morning, I’ve got to see to it that I have the best start into the day.
A positive mindset, in fact, is the daily act of reminding onself to be positive. It has nothing to do with what comes to you naturally.
I have recently started going to a therapist for my anxiety and feelings of “downness”. It’s something that I’ve been dealing with more or less for the past few years; I’m not sure what exactly made me take that step just right now.
One part of my road to self-exploration and, ultimately, self-help is trying to figure out what is actually bothering me and what, perhaps, in my past may cause me to feel and react in these ways. This all sounds reasonable.
I am not sure whether I want to rehash my past and stir up old feelings. Though nothing severe has ever happened to me and I am lucky to say that I’ve never experienced any trauma, I am still hesitant to deal with my now long-buried emotions. I know there are incidents and memories in my life that I’ve stored remotely in the back of my head (there was a struggle to get them and make them stay there; not to be completely consumed by them).
I am afraid of what I might realise if I uncover those “unknown” deep hidden pieces of myself.